Adventures

 This spring has been cloudy, cool, and kind of serious. I don't know why, but the weather has had a serious tone. Not dangerous, obviously, just somber. I have enjoyed it, though that may surprise you from the recent blog posts all about sunshine or the lack thereof. When the weather isn't oppressive, I find that I simply feel more.

I've also taken advantage of getting out and into nature a bit. A couple of weeks ago, Leo and I ventured into Don Robinson State Park. It was quite beautiful. It had rained recently, so I fell down. A lot. But, for the most part, all that was damaged was my pride. Actually, that's not true either. I have no shame or embarrassment about falling down. It's kind of just part of taking risks, I think. Now, there was one particular fall that happened while a photographer looked on, but even then I didn't feel embarrassed. Just concerned for Leo, since I had been holding him at the time.

My best adventure came on Mother's Day. This is a duplicate post to something I wrote on Facebook, but worth repeating here: A few months ago, I decided I needed something to look forward to, so I signed up for the Tough Mudder (5k). The last few weeks, I have been regretting that decision a little. My friend had to drop out, my family couldn’t come watch (S is quarantined). The weather was - not delightful. But I did it. I loved it. I have not been prouder of myself in a very long time. The obstacles were challenging, but the hardest thing I did was get out of bed. #HappyMuddersDay 

I want to add that a part of the reason that I'm particularly proud is because I had been feeling down on my body recently. I gained something close to a Covid 19 and had worried that it would hold me back from my goals. My goals were to: 1) attempt 75% of the obstacles, 2) finish, 3) not hurt myself. I completed each and every one of the obstacles!! I did finish. And the only damage done to my body was surface stuff - lots of bruising. I just didn't need to reach some ideal level of fitness to be able to kick ass on the obstacle course, and that made me very happy. Rather than decreasing my desires to achieve more fitness, it helped me have a better idea of what I'm capable of, and that will help me as I get back on track here. 

Anyway, just wanted to share some adventuring I've done. Looking forward to a summer full of activity and excitement. Getting back to some level of normalcy, even. 

Written on a cloudy (literally and figuratively) day:

Don't go looking for the sun just yet.

The rays will reach you where you are.

It's okay if the warmth causes the steam to rise from the tears on your cheek.

Focus on the sunshine

 I keep starting posts for the blog. The posts that I can't quite finish are about things like parenting and renewal and grief. I just can't seem to find the right endings to them so I'll keep them until I do. 

For now, I'll just keep

it light and airy. 

Last summer, we experimented with kayaking. We decided to use inflatable kayaks just to see if we'd actually use them before we made an investment in the real deal. I'm happy to report that we did use our inflatable, lovely, but unwieldy kayaks. So we pulled the trigger and got three hard side kayaks. 

We love them!! If you're in the market, I can give you a full review. Otherwise, just believe me that they are so much easier to use and increase our relaxation level by many degrees. 

Cannot wait until we get some consistent sunshine and warmer days, but we took advantage of the warm days a couple of weeks ago.

Happy (practically) spring!

Random Sample

 I haven't had much to say here, clearly. Still don't. I have also taken a break from my daily journal. It's just the way things are right now. Every day is essentially the same. That's not a complaint. We are happy and cozy and have made the most of our moments. Ups and downs like everyone. Here are a few pictures that will catch me up on the blog. Maybe the spring will bring more posts - especially since we have a yard now!

Happy Birthday, Sophia!

Happy, happy birthday, Sophia!!

Today is usually your favorite day of the year, and I am hopeful that this year will be no different in that respect. 

This year has been an exercise in flexibility and disappointment. This is true for all of us, of course, but for a person in their first year of the "teenage" years, it's been especially hard. In last year's letter, I talked about how you were getting a handle on all the ways that you could step away and grow your independent self! That was true and exciting. This pandemic has called for a lot more creativity in terms of separation and freedom. You're at home with your parents way more than you were planning. Fewer opportunities to stretch those wings, but many more opportunities to show maturity.

This year has proven that you can do hard things. Very few things have been as easy as they should have been this year, but you have met it all with courage. I am so proud of the way you've handled every hiccup and disappointment. It's also been proven that you are a true and reliable friend. It's not easy to connect with friends right now, but I've been so impressed at your willingness to put yourself out there and take a risk in order to have real connection. Again, an inspiration, Sophia.

In spite of many changes, some things remain the same. You are so funny. Even in the midst of whatever we're in the midst of right now, you can reliably make us laugh. You are so full of love - for your family, friends and maybe especially for Leo. Your sweetness and your humor truly bring so much joy into our home. One of my favorite things, and this has been true for years, is the way that you continually attempt to discover and create the person you are and who you want to be. That is no small thing, and people decades older than you have yet to master the skill of self-discovery. 

What do I even hope for you for this year? I hope that you continue to find ways to be yourself and believe in yourself. If you had a fraction of the faith in you that I do, you would know that you can face anything that comes your way. Since I don't know what this year holds, that's what I want most for you. 

I can't believe it's been 14 years since I first held you and looked down into that perfect face. Even though I have to look up into your beautiful face now, I still feel the same wonder and joy just knowing that you're ours.

Happy birthday, Sophia. Love you so much!

Mom

8th Grade Begins

Sophia has been back in school for a couple of weeks now. After the spring attempt at online learning, I was definitely holding my breath a little. Fortunately, 8th grade is off to a great start. 

Leo is a big fan of the time in between classes. Sophia usually has time for a quick kiss or snuggle, and he appreciates being remembered. 

 A couple of the days have been nice enough to take class outside. That is quite a treat for her and, again, for Leo. He may be getting a little spoiled by this whole setup. 

Overall, we're just thrilled that eighth grade is getting off to a great start!

Minnesota Moments

Our original 2020 vacation was across the pond. As we're not welcome there right now, we had to think again. So, we packed up our inflatable kayaks and our dog and headed north. A few days in Grand Marais, and a few days in Duluth. It was quite pleasant. I especially loved our time in Grand Marais. 

We are the people who let our dog sit at the table with us. He's such a good guy to have around. He rarely embarrasses us. Now that we're back home, he's disappointed that he no longer gets to sit around the table with us. 

We didn't kayak as much as we thought we would, but we did get out on Two Islands Lake, and it was lovely! A really pleasant time.

We got multiple great hikes. This one was inland, and the mosquitoes were THICK. We came away with very few bites, but we were just wiping them off our necks as they settled. 

We had a couple of rainy days. On one of them, we still got out for some hikes, and Leo was less than thrilled with that particular adventure.

My favorite spot in all of Grand Marais is Artist's Point. It's beautiful and peaceful and takes some intention to get out there. I really enjoyed the scramble over the rocks to get there.

Our hotel was right on the beach of Lake Superior. The water was cold, but it still made for a lovely setting. And of course Sophia got in it.

Something I didn't know that I wanted to do was swim under a waterfall. True that this isn't the biggest waterfall we saw by a long stretch, but it made for such a nice natural freshwater swimming hole that we really enjoyed swimming here even though we had a pool back at the hotel in Duluth.

This was in Duluth on our last night of vacation. The whole trip was as relaxed as I think we're capable of being right now. Masks in public places. Washing hands and not eating inside, etc. It was much needed in terms of a change of scenery and a restart to our routine. Hoping now we have the steam to make it to the start of (online) school.