Happy Birthday, Sophia!

Happy, happy birthday, Sophia!!

Today is usually your favorite day of the year, and I am hopeful that this year will be no different in that respect. 

This year has been an exercise in flexibility and disappointment. This is true for all of us, of course, but for a person in their first year of the "teenage" years, it's been especially hard. In last year's letter, I talked about how you were getting a handle on all the ways that you could step away and grow your independent self! That was true and exciting. This pandemic has called for a lot more creativity in terms of separation and freedom. You're at home with your parents way more than you were planning. Fewer opportunities to stretch those wings, but many more opportunities to show maturity.

This year has proven that you can do hard things. Very few things have been as easy as they should have been this year, but you have met it all with courage. I am so proud of the way you've handled every hiccup and disappointment. It's also been proven that you are a true and reliable friend. It's not easy to connect with friends right now, but I've been so impressed at your willingness to put yourself out there and take a risk in order to have real connection. Again, an inspiration, Sophia.

In spite of many changes, some things remain the same. You are so funny. Even in the midst of whatever we're in the midst of right now, you can reliably make us laugh. You are so full of love - for your family, friends and maybe especially for Leo. Your sweetness and your humor truly bring so much joy into our home. One of my favorite things, and this has been true for years, is the way that you continually attempt to discover and create the person you are and who you want to be. That is no small thing, and people decades older than you have yet to master the skill of self-discovery. 

What do I even hope for you for this year? I hope that you continue to find ways to be yourself and believe in yourself. If you had a fraction of the faith in you that I do, you would know that you can face anything that comes your way. Since I don't know what this year holds, that's what I want most for you. 

I can't believe it's been 14 years since I first held you and looked down into that perfect face. Even though I have to look up into your beautiful face now, I still feel the same wonder and joy just knowing that you're ours.

Happy birthday, Sophia. Love you so much!

Mom

8th Grade Begins

Sophia has been back in school for a couple of weeks now. After the spring attempt at online learning, I was definitely holding my breath a little. Fortunately, 8th grade is off to a great start. 

Leo is a big fan of the time in between classes. Sophia usually has time for a quick kiss or snuggle, and he appreciates being remembered. 

 A couple of the days have been nice enough to take class outside. That is quite a treat for her and, again, for Leo. He may be getting a little spoiled by this whole setup. 

Overall, we're just thrilled that eighth grade is getting off to a great start!

Minnesota Moments

Our original 2020 vacation was across the pond. As we're not welcome there right now, we had to think again. So, we packed up our inflatable kayaks and our dog and headed north. A few days in Grand Marais, and a few days in Duluth. It was quite pleasant. I especially loved our time in Grand Marais. 

We are the people who let our dog sit at the table with us. He's such a good guy to have around. He rarely embarrasses us. Now that we're back home, he's disappointed that he no longer gets to sit around the table with us. 

We didn't kayak as much as we thought we would, but we did get out on Two Islands Lake, and it was lovely! A really pleasant time.

We got multiple great hikes. This one was inland, and the mosquitoes were THICK. We came away with very few bites, but we were just wiping them off our necks as they settled. 

We had a couple of rainy days. On one of them, we still got out for some hikes, and Leo was less than thrilled with that particular adventure.

My favorite spot in all of Grand Marais is Artist's Point. It's beautiful and peaceful and takes some intention to get out there. I really enjoyed the scramble over the rocks to get there.

Our hotel was right on the beach of Lake Superior. The water was cold, but it still made for a lovely setting. And of course Sophia got in it.

Something I didn't know that I wanted to do was swim under a waterfall. True that this isn't the biggest waterfall we saw by a long stretch, but it made for such a nice natural freshwater swimming hole that we really enjoyed swimming here even though we had a pool back at the hotel in Duluth.

This was in Duluth on our last night of vacation. The whole trip was as relaxed as I think we're capable of being right now. Masks in public places. Washing hands and not eating inside, etc. It was much needed in terms of a change of scenery and a restart to our routine. Hoping now we have the steam to make it to the start of (online) school. 

Homemade Pizza

Every time we make pizza at home, I think of my grandma. It was one of her favorite meals, but my grandpa wasn't that into it, so she always used us kids as an excuse to break it out. Just like with all her favorites in the kitchen, she loved to experiment with it and see how she could improve. Just because we loved it already didn't mean we couldn't love it more.

In our house, Erick is the pizza experimenter. He also prides himself on finding the perfect recipes and techniques to bring deliciousness to life. Our quarantined life has made it possible for him to make pizzas even during the week. It's definitely one of our silver linings.

Here is one of his doughs rising.

Sometimes he mixes up some ground beef with Italian spices to go on top. That's yummy.

This pizza got a lovely brown on top, and the crust was delicious.

Last night, he cooked our pizzas on the grill. They started out on foil so the crust could firm up. Then he'd move it to indirect heat to finish up and get a little char on the bottom. These pizzas were the best. Crunchy and full of flavor. Mmmm.

He was pretty proud of the product even before we had tasted it.

I know better than to get attached to exactly that because perfection does not mean the end of experimentation. And I wouldn't have it any other way.

Yellow Cake Chocolate Frosting

We made this cake a couple of weeks ago. It was delicious. We're trying to do a little better for our bodes and not spend so much time baking and eating. So, I'll just relive it here and imagine the way it tasted. Not too sweet. Just perfect.

The recipe, which I won't put here for this one, called for buttermilk, and we happened to have some! I buy buttermilk because Sophia makes some really delicious buttermilk biscuits occasionally. Anyway, the buttermilk contributed to the less sweet taste of the cake, I think. It was dense and moist.

Our favorite icing to cake combo is yellow cake and chocolate frosting. We used the same chocolate frosting recipe that we used on Sophia's half birthday. That frosting is amazing. So creamy. Not at all difficult to spread. I just love that stuff. I should really just make some and keep it on hand! We know why that's a bad idea, but it would be oh, so wonderful.

Here is our completed cake. It stayed together so much better than the chocolate cake did, too.

Perfect little layers of yellow cake goodness. We are trying to make good choices, but seeing this cake again definitely makes it harder.

Hope you're enjoying some quarantined deliciousness of your own! 

Socially Distanced Photo Shoots

During the first week of quarantine, which was also Sophia's Spring Break, Sophia and I walked into the woods to do a little photo shoot. It was a reason to get showered and dressed and out of the house. We decided it was something we would do occasionally as this went on. Yesterday was our second effort. Lots of fun to do this together. Sophia's enjoying being in front of and behind the camera. I'm just enjoying the silliness of the moments.

For this particular day's photos, we went up the hill to Concordia Seminary - a place with great architecture and plants to choose from as backgrounds.

Here is an over-the-shoulder smile that I'm proud of.

The squat and look up at me shot. A few shadows on the face, but overall a great picture of a beautiful girl.

This one I love because I caught the real giggle. I can't take credit for the giggle, though, she was cracking herself up.

Not sure what this is, but it was fun anyhow.

Her instructions here were, "Look confident." We can only hope that this is not actually how I look when I feel confident. Otherwise, I should definitely feel that less often.

Classic Senior picture moment. Super cute, though.

She thinks this is hilarious. She was being silly on purpose but has no idea what's meant to be happening with her hand.

Here is a photo from the jumping series.

Here's a selection from the running series.

Here is my Senior picture section. She did a great job, and I'm actually really pleased with these! Next professional headshot, probably!

 And, finally, here is our togetherness shot. Happily hanging out in the Spring sunshine. There are plenty of odd and uncomfortable moments in all of this, but I am so grateful to have Erick and this lovely girl to share every day with.

Recipe for Homemade Granola

Like everyone else, we've obviously been doing a lot in the kitchen while we're on Stay-at-Home orders. Not sure which term I like best for this state of being. 'Shelter in Place' is a good one. 'Quarantining' doesn't apply if you're not sick, right? Even 'self-quarantine' is something that requires symptoms. 'Social distancing' only applies when you're outside. Whatever you call it, we're all at home if we're able to do so, and we're all spending lots of time in the kitchen.

Today, Sophia made her very delicious homemade granola. I decided to share her recipe here in case anyone needed to make some of their own. This is a recipe from cookieandkate.com that Sophia makes every so often, and she has made a few of her own tweaks over time. So, it's tried and true and quite delicious all on its own or on yogurt with a little ripe fruit.

HOMEMADE GRANOLA
INGREDIENTS

• 4 Cups rolled oats
• 1 1/2 cups raw nuts or seeds (she uses 1 cup pecans, heaping 1/2 cup of almonds)
• 1 tsp sea salt (if table salt 3/4 tsp)
• 1/2 tsp ground cinnamon
• 1/2 cup olive oil
• 1/2 cup honey
• 1 tsp vanilla

DIRECTIONS

1. Preheat oven to 350 and cover a cookie sheet with parchment paper
2. Put the nuts into individual baggies and crumble them with a rolling pin or tenderizer or something. Pecans don't take much, but the almonds are much more difficult to break down.
3. In a large bowl, combine oats, nuts, salt & cinnamon
4. Pour in oil, honey and vanilla. Mix well until each oat and nut has a covering of sticky
5. Pour mixture onto your prepared sheet and use spatula to spread it in a pressed, even layer
6. Bake until lightly golden, about 21 to 24 minutes, stirring halfway and pressing again
7. Let the granola cool completely, undisturbed for an hour. Break with your hands for extra clumpy or stir with a spoon for smaller crunches.

Mixing the granola goodness

Pressing to maintain its crunchiness

Before the bake

Deliciousness after the bake.

School's Out! Only not at all, really...

When Sophia's school was on spring break, they let us know that it would be online at least through April 22nd. Last week, they let us know that the kids won't be entering the buildings again this year. Then the governor made that official for everyone, so at least there's that. 

For the first couple of weeks of online school, Sophia has been at the dining room table. It's roomy and bright and the chairs are comfortable. It worked. However, once it was officially going to be the full quarter, we decided she needed some more permanence and privacy. So, I set her up in our third bedroom/back room this morning. Now she has a designated study and classroom space and can focus without interruptions from me or Erick. From me, it's puttering, cooking, walking in and out. From Erick, it's conference calls and wandering through. So, we're hoping for the best. School has not been easy so far, but I know everyone is just doing the best they can. Seventh grade has gotten pretty weird, but I know Sophia will get through it. I just keep wondering what all of this is going to mean for these kids. What an interesting and memorable way to spend a spring.

Half Birthday - Full Chocolate

Friday was Sophia's half birthday. We don't normally celebrate those kinds of things, but pretty sure everyone could use an excuse to make cake right now.

We made my grandma's chocolate cake recipe. It was delicious. Since it was a half birthday, we layered the two round pans into four half layers. It was momentarily beautiful. As soon as we cut into it, the cake fell apart. But that did not affect its texture or taste or ability to lift us up. Really good cake is what I'm saying.

No half birthday letter, but let's just say that we are looking for the next reason to celebrate!

A poem I wrote

Hi there! This is Sophia. I haven't posted in so long!! Sorry about that. I am writing this now because I wrote a poem yesterday about my feelings towards everything that is happening in our world right now. I am not going to say anything else about my interpretation, because I don't want it to influence its effect on you as you read it. My poem doesn't have a title yet, but here it is.

My emotions
Fragile as a house of cards
One mistake
One deep breath
There it goes

My emotions
Hard as steel
Unchanging
Callous

My fragile
Callous emotions
Pulling slowly
On loose threads
Unravel my world
Unwelcome change
Unwanted destruction

My emotions
Ever-changing
Ever remaining the same

A Tree Finding Light

Proud of this girl

In case anyone missed the memo, middle school is not an easy place to spend all of one's time. There are challenges from start to finish each day. Being thirteen is not the simplest age to be either. Sometimes I say that these middle schoolers are trying to start discovering who they are. The truth is probably closer to - they just started realizing that they have no clue who they are. That's a lot harder than the other one, I think.

Anyway, I'm just really proud of Sophia. She works hard in school. She pays attention to her friends. She puts up with Erick and me and actually likes us most of the time. She loves adventure, though she loves predictability, too. She is not just one thing. She's many things, and I like them all.

It just felt like a day that I should mark the time. Things change so quickly. Young people are facing a lot of obstacles from outside and pressure from inside. At least, Sophia usually has that inner pressure going on. And she hangs on with maturity and grace more often than expected. I know this may not always be the case, and I won't be any less proud of her then.

Today, I'm feeling proud and amazed by this person in our house. So grateful to get to watch and occasionally participate in the development of one remarkable human person.
.

2020

It is almost impossible to believe that we are only a week into 2020. It has gotten off to a running start for us.

I wanted to slow down just a minute and share how we brought in this shiny new decade.

Sophia had a full two weeks off for winter break, so it felt right that we should go somewhere, at least for a few days. Since we didn't feel like the full drive to New Orleans, we compromised on Memphis. Erick and I have been there a couple of times in the year or two leading up to parenthood, but we haven't been back since.

We were so pleasantly surprised by all the fun things for us to do. We knew there would be lots of great food.

Since it was New Year's Eve, we weren't sure how much time we would get to spend on Beale Street, but we had a great time visiting BB King's Blues Joint for lunch. The food was delicious! And the music was very enjoyable.

Since the weather was tolerable, we spent quite a bit of time wandering around as well. This was further down Beale Street. That whole area was a little smaller than we remembered, but the rest of Memphis had a lot more to offer than we realized.

New Year's Eve itself was pretty low key for us. The Hotel Indigo had their pool open. Shockingly, even Sophia agreed that it was too cold for a dip. We did play corn hole on the pool deck in the time just after the ball dropped in NYC.

Sophia and Leo both enjoyed the city. They just like being together, really.

One thing that we were all excited to find was the dog park on Mud Island. Open to visitors. Leo was, as you can see, quite thrilled with that development.

It was a great finish to one year, and a wonderful start for a new decade. Like I said, we've all been running a little like Leo there since we got home, but hopefully things will calm down in the near future. I look forward to seeing what this year holds.